August 15, 2000

Good Bye My Friend, Good Bye

Sandwiched between Adieu bashes and birthday celebrations, Mumbai was on a roller coaster of Do or Die nights that had every denizen reaching into their closet for something different, seeing as so many of the invitations had a dress code. The city and her touchy feelie, air kissing army of socially connected people set themselves a punishing pace this past week, rushing from the one event to the next with an inexhaustible charge of energy. Sonia Garware, Sunita Saxena, Kishen Mulchandani and Bhavnesh Soni all had mega birthday bashes where their close friends and acquaintances swelled the chosen venue from anywhere between two hundred to eight hundred or more, as at Kishen’s.

Sanjeev Choudhary, who has been a close friend and confidant, had dozens of friends and well wishers throw him ‘Alvida’ parties, at last count we had lost count but that only goes to prove that he had endeared himself to a vast cross section of Mumbai society in his inimitable, charming, persuasive manner. I bear testimony to the numerous people Sanjeev has helped in his simple, it’s a breeze, nonchalance, easy to say but very hard to do. He has championed noble causes, raised funds for charity and had an unswerving loyalty to the few, he called friends. A ‘people person’ to the core, no good deed escaped his enthusiasm and dedication. Though slim and slight of build, he towered with the vivacious warmth and goodness inherent within.

In the popularity stakes, Sanjeev won hands down, meticulous yet thoughtful, Sanjeev made the perfect host as he ensured every guest had a hefty dose of hospitality and largesse to the point of spoilt. In return, he was feted by the city’s hostesses for his ‘very intellectual’, part funny, part serious persona, rounded as it was with a wicked sense of humour which could at times veer to risque. He has on numerous occasions taken my sons out with the children of his ‘Man Friday’ Porus and in this simple democratisation lay the goodness, love and humility of Sanjeev. It would not be an exaggeration to say that Sanjeev will be missed by many in the city but to the little people, the children and the less fortunate to whom he reached out with a manic fervor he will be immortalised in the temples of their hearts.

I have had my fair share of pain this past month and feel that losing a true friend, albeit just to new shores, is going to wrench at the very core of me, rare is the quality of unquestioning loyalty and the love of a good friend, the loss of this friend will leave a gaping vacuum in my life. I know the pettiness of a few, the small mindedness and manipulativeness of a coward, here and there, has hurt my friend, in his across the board interaction with the city, but in rising above it and carving a niche of goodwill he has endeared himself to the vast majority. Parting though a sweet sorrow, deep down I know that Sanjeev Choudhary will be back in another avatar of the born-again diplomat, and therein lies hope and joy for tomorrow is another day.

The first and only farewell party I attended in honour of Sanjeev, and there were a score and more, was at the Israeli Consul General Dov Segev-Streinberg’s home. Elegant and select, the evening was full of warmth and ‘bonhomie’, Ashwini Khakkar brought Sanjeev’s farewell gift which included a large modern Indian painting and a lovely silver salver. It was Sujata Assommul’s birthday and the lucky lady was given a lovely silver necklace and matching drop earrings, undoubtedly generous, perhaps to a fault ‘Ash’ as we fondly refer to him, is a paragon of hospitality and generosity. Our host Dov put out a lavish spread and was endearingly warm to each of his many guests, which included the lovely Rashmi Mehta with her dashing husband Shekhar, the attractively demure Kanchan Desai with debonair Ketan, the singing duo of Devika and Suresh Bhojwani, the elegant Manju Sanghi with her dapper husband Mahendra, Aarti Surendranath looked like an exotic middle-eastern princess, while Kailash looked like a fusion musician in leather with a grey fuzz on his chin. Dr and Mrs Narendra Pandya epitomised the art of healthy living, looking slim and attractive. Sharon Prabhakar, Sabira Merchant and Jimmy Kapoor were the other lovely ladies I spotted before taking leave.

A month in mourning is like an emotional spring clean, a condolence letter a caring phone call, a shared remembrance all have the power to bring on an in voluntary bout of crying. This catharsis has been made agonisingly poignant with Sanjeev’s leaving. Sheldon Austin, another diplomat and friend, leaves this week to head back to the US. Kishen’s birthday bash needs a full column as does my farewell to Sheldon, I close by wishing Sanjeev God speed and ‘Bon Voyage’, content in the knowledge that we will meet soon and grateful to the Lord for making our paths cross, thus enriching our lives forever.

 

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